I miss your arms wrapped around me, my
blanket on a winter’s night. The warmth and
comfort of steaming tea too
hot to sip.
I miss the way your hand fitted
into mine. We were two pieces of a
jigsaw; old and new, that only
partially matched. Pressing and
crushing harder to fit only
damaging our
hearts.
Slowly bleeding out the sides
staining your soul.
You never realized that I was slowly turning
red. Every argument and
relapse pushed it deeper. Red running
faster. I wonder if you will ever realize that I was
always in love with your beautiful blue
eyes from the moment i saw
you across the bus.
You didn’t need to change how you
acted, you didn’t need to tighten your
grip, suffocating me, dragging downwards,
drowning my soul. I was
fighting for us, victory was
insight.
You tried to fix your perfect
puzzle piece, trying to make
us more compatible, failing and
ripping us apart, It was me that was
damaged, healing slowly but not
perfectly. I didn’t care how we didn’t quite
fit, we were unique.
You taught me to look out
new eyes.
I learned to break open my
chest, ripping my
heart out, destroying what
was healed and still live
without your arms.
I’m still oozing blood painfully.
You still rip me to
shreds of misery and
guilt.
I love you.
I ripped myself apart to
save you from
me.
First Published on: https://offtherecordblog.org/
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