LGBT Lives: Bisexuality Q&A with Chris Smith

Q: So are you/do you consider yourself to be bisexual?
A: Yes

Q: And what does that mean?
A: I’ve had relationships with both men and women

Q: What’s the difference between bisexuality and pansexuality?
A: I don’t think there’s much of a difference but there is a slight difference obviously, I see myself as Bisexual but Pansexuality isn’t out of my reach. If I met someone who was transgender for example and I really loved them I would definitely be open to a relationship.

Q: How was the ‘Coming out’ process for you and do you feel it was easier than if you’d come out as gay?
A: It was reasonably easy, most people kinda guessed and kinda knew. The big thing is with bisexuality that lots of people still don’t understand the difference between the two, a lot of folk who I’ve openly told I am Bisexual still think I’m gay and just don’t realize that they are two different things. But yeah most people knew, the only person who still doesn’t know is my dad. Initially I didn’t tell my dad because I didn’t think he’d understand and because his side of the family is more old school so I thought I’d best keep it away from them but now I think he does know, and I just don’t want to drag it up and go through that whole coming out process. I mean there’s no point going through that whole rigmarole process of coming out, he’ll find out when I finally settle down with someone.

Q: Do you feel there’s a stigma attached to being bisexual?
A: No, I think people that are gay take Bisexual people less seriously than straight people do. In Scotland today we are very open to all this stuff and most straight people are perfectly fine with it, whereas members of the gay community are more likely to think it’s just a phase or you’re just transitioning into a gay person.

Q: What’s something you want everyone to know about being bisexual?
A: It’s not that we’re greedy, it’s that we’re open to all different types of relationships.

Q: What is the worst stereotype or stereotypes about being bisexual?
A: Exactly what I just said, everyone just assumes that if you’re bisexual you’re just being greedy or that you’ll just take it wherever it comes from, when in fact it’s just that I’ve had relationships with guys, with girls and that I don’t see the barrier being what gender you are or what genitalia you were born with it’s whether I love you as a person.

Q: Do you feel fetishized for your sexuality?
A: Not really fetishized no, a lot of folk seem okay with it, but no I don’t feel fetishized.

Q: Do you feel less trusted in a relationship than someone who’s either straight or gay?
A: See that’s hard to answer because I, myself haven’t been in a long term committed relationship I’ve found that people tend to date me as a safety buffer between other relationships, they come and date me so they can feel comfortable before they go into a real relationship.

Q: Do you feel equally interested in both genders or is it more fluid than that?
A: I think I’m more prone to Men than Women, but I don’t know if that’s because I find women more annoying.

Q: Do you feel that you have to have been with both genders to be considered bisexual?
A: Yes. Well Me, I don’t really bother but a lot of people think you’ve got to have been with both to be considered Bisexual. I myself have never been with a woman but I’m still attracted to women and I’d happily have sex with one it the situation arose.

Q: How do you feel about the perception that bisexual people must just be testing the waters or experimenting?
A: That does frustrate me, that annoys me. There’s plenty of proof I mean its LGBT, the B is in there they can’t just claim that we’re not part of the thing and we’re obviously just curious. When you eventually settle down with someone, I could settle down with a guy or a lassie today, I could be happy with a guy for many years then when I split with them I could go ‘I fancy a lassie now’.


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